Self Reflection - I survived being an orphan

I lost my Mother at the age of seven. I was raised by the family members.
My Mother was never married. As an orphan, you are perceived to be disobedient.
Orphans are known for self-pity for an example if they are being disciplined they like to say it's done because they are orphans if their parents were still alive they would have been treated differently.
An orphan at the same time is expected for disobedience like abandoning home and live in the streets, not getting along with the family members, teenage /unplanned pregnancy, poverty, uneducated, lack of motivation, bitterness or anger, alcohol and drug abuse, being losers etc.
I chose to be different
I chose to change the perception.

Written by Lisa Nqala

What i have learned about myself (Part 1) - Dear teen

#The Power of Having Dreams, Goals and a Vision For Your life Before Dating

When you are in a relationship it’s easy to lose yourself or feel stuck, but when you know your story it’s easy to step back and ask yourself, is this the life I want for myself? Is this the life I hoped for? Is this the life I would choose for myself over and over again? Is this the life worth risking for? Our dream, goals and vision are our light and guidance no matter what happens in our lives. Sometimes we need to be single or be alone to start dreaming, having goals and vision for our lives, so that when we start dating again we are wiser and have new perceptions. Once you develop and improve yourself you attract better, you receive better and you love better.

Written by Lisa Nqala

IF MY LIFE WAS PERFECT(DEAR TEEN)

 

If my life was perfect I would not have known how to deal with rejection.

I would not have known how to go forward in life with a heartbreak, resentment and doubts and still successes

I would not have an eager to change perceptions about myself and my life

I would not have known how to fight for my goals and my dreams

I would not have known how to rise after falling

I would not have known how to start over after disappointments

I would not have known how to be excited about starting over after failure and disappointments

I would not have known that fear will always be there to distract you for going after your blessings and goals

I would not have known how to deal with hatred

I would not have been interesting

I would not have been an inspiration

I would not have known vulnerability

I would not have benefited from vulnerability

Written by Lisa Nqala

LESSON LEARNED : MAYBE I NEEDED ME MORE THAN I NEEDED YOU (DEAR TEEN) PART THREE

Maybe I needed to make my own decisions more than I wanted you to make decisions about us.

Maybe you were part of the mistakes I needed to make.

Maybe the ending it was more necessary than fixing it.

Maybe the last words were more powerful than the first words

Maybe the peace of mind was much needed than the anger, hurting, arguments, “we need to talk”, why you did or did not do this.

 Maybe letting it go was much needed to bring back light in my life.

Maybe the healing was much needed than the solutions.

Maybe the new book with new chapters was much needed than the old book with old chapters.

Maybe the new memories were much needed to be created with someone new than replaying the old memories.

Maybe I needed to free myself more than I needed to be attached to you.

Maybe I needed to invest more on myself before I invested in you and the relationship.

Maybe I needed to believe in myself more than I needed you to believe in me.

Maybe I needed more time for things that give me joy than being broken, sad because you ignored, played and rejected me.

Written by Lisa Nqala

LESSON LEARNED : MAYBE I NEEDED ME MORE THAN I NEEDED YOU (DEAR TEEN) PART ONE

MAYBE I NEEDED ME MORE THAN I NEEDED YOU

Maybe I needed to heal myself more than I needed you to heal me.

Maybe I needed to support myself more than I needed you to support me

Maybe I needed to motivate myself more than I needed you to motivate me.

Maybe I needed to encourage myself more than I needed you to encourage you.

Written by Lisa Nqala

LESSON LEARNED : MAYBE I NEEDED ME MORE THAN I NEEDED YOU (DEAR TEEN) PART TWO

Maybe I needed to assure myself about achieving my goals, fighting for my goal and dreams more than I needed your assurance about our relationship.

Maybe I needed to assure myself about my future before I needed you to assure me about our future.

Maybe I needed to fight for my goals and my dreams before I expected you to fight for our relationship goals and dreams.

Maybe I needed to give myself enough time to figure out if you worth it before I committed to you fully.

Maybe I should have known that some days are good and some days are bad and sad without a specific reason than to blame you for my bad days.

Maybe my higher self and my guardian angel got tired of watching you playing with my feelings and hurting me.

Written by Lisa Nqala

LESSON LEARNED : MAYBE I NEEDED ME MORE THAN I NEEDED YOU (DEAR TEEN) PART FOUR

Maybe I needed to appreciate myself more than I expected you to appreciate me.

Maybe I needed to consider and accept my past experiences and wounds before I hope that your love would heal me.

Maybe I needed to know that I had a void before I met your rather than blaming you for it.

Maybe I needed to worry more about betraying and hurting myself more than worrying about you lying, betraying, and hurting me.

Maybe I needed to give myself more second chances for working on my gaols and dreams than giving you second chances and wasting my time.

Maybe I needed to be hurt than to hurt others

Maybe I needed to be played, used than to play and use other people

Maybe I needed to inspire more than I needed to be inspired

Maybe I needed to be followed more than I needed to follow

Maybe I needed to lead more than I needed to be led

Maybe I needed to be an example more than I needed an example.

Written by Lisa Nqala